‘Tis the season to deck the halls, eat candy canes, and run marathons.
Oh, running 26.2 miles at the break of dawn doesn’t sound enjoyable to you? Too bad, sucker. That’s what all the cool kids are doing these days. If my Facebook feed counts as a scientific sample, then 83% of people in their twenties are currently training for, have just run, or are pretending to have just run a marathon. It’s an epidemic! An over-priced Lululemon wearing, cutesy motivational poster posting epidemic! The worst kind. You know, other than Ebola.
Naturally, I have a theory. Our generation’s sudden interest in running boils down to this: We’re a bunch of jerks. When we graduated college, just a few short years ago, we were wide-eyed and optimistic. Y’all, we were going to save the world! That job we took, wresting candy and toys from cancer-ridden orphans? Temporary. We just needed to finish up our Peace Corps application. Fast-forward a few years, when we’ve trashed the application altogether and are really enjoying our new gold-plated toilet. Shit. What happened to that spunky, quixotic kid we used to be? There must be a way we can recover that golden aura of inner goodness! Enter the marathon.
Pardon me, while I get a little academic up in here, readers. You see, I live for studies on body image and cultural perceptions of beauty. One of my favorites is the “What Is Beautiful Is Good” study, which basically found that we think attractive people are nicer, more successful, and have rectums made of rainbows. In America? Universally attractive = physically fit. And nothing says “I am a fashionably trim bad-ass who can delicately bench-press a baby elephant!” like training for a marathon.
It’s a big deal. I will grant you that. You have to train like crazy, go on carb-loading binges, and there’s the ever-present danger of chafing. It’s a lot of damn work. It has a pretty big pay-off, however. When you tell people what you’re doing, they will act as if you just cured cancer. You will be called disciplined, persistent, and amazing! People will probably make t-shirts with your face on them, then come cheer you on at the race. When friends set you up on blind dates, they include your new-found athleticism in your vital This Person Is Awesome statistics: She works as an orphan oppressor, speaks Farsi, came in second for Miss Travis County, and runs marathons! You are suddenly like a cross between Marilyn Monroe and a star high-school quarterback. Obviously, you are on the road to sainthood, one mile at a time.
Nope. Sorry to rain on your parade, but you’re still an asshat. You’re just an asshat who now brags about that crazy cramp you got in mile thirteen. I know it’s hard to believe, but running dozens of miles does not erase your fondness for drop-kicking puppies or that time you slept with my boyfriend. That’s okay. We all have disappointments. Drinking tea and adding a “u” to color hasn’t made me British yet either.
What’s more, marathons aren’t necessarily good for you. Hear me out. I’m almost a doctor. (Really.) Running is good for you, yes. Extreme running is potentially not. Your heart is actually worse off at the end of running 26.2 miles than it was before. Cardiac Troponin T, one of the signs of possible heart damage, may now flow through your blood like herpes on the Jersey Shore. In some cases, your heart has actually changed shape and its ventricles are less efficient! It can take months for it to recover. If you repeat this multiple times? If you become that holy grail of fitness, talked about in hushed, awed tones by others: a marathoner? You could end up with scarring on your heart and calcified arteries. Fun times!
Here’s my advice: Instead of signing up for that marathon, where you will exchange money for a t-shirt, paper number, and a case of mild dehydration, go volunteer. It will make your soul smile, will still fool others into thinking you’re nice, and won’t damage your heart! Plus, I will find you less annoying. Please, just don’t go to the animal shelter. They still haven’t found a home for that poor Goldendoodle you “walked.”
- Grace
Author’s Note: If you’re one of those people who purely loves to run, you may continue. Just understand that when I don’t compliment you on your new, glittery 26.2 bumper sticker, it’s not that I don’t think you’re neat. Unless you’re Ryan Reynolds, I just don’t give a shit about your marathon time.
Author’s Note Part Two: It should be noted that I don’t hate marathoners or runners or even Lululemon lovers. Follow your bliss, my dears. My point was this: running 26.2 miles doesn’t make you a good person. It doesn’t make you a bad one either. You’re just a person who runs a lot, good or bad. Happy Holidays!
I just laughed so hard coffee almost shot out my nose. Thank you for that. Seriously. It was worth it.
Happy to be of help, Jamie. Though, we aren’t responsible for any 3rd-degree nose burns.
Thanks for commenting and laughing!
Pingback: Freshly Pressed | My blog, my opinions, my voice.
Brilliant post. The fact that running (particularly extreme running) has developed into a cult only serves to feed the delusions that “you are on the road to sainthood, one mile at a time.”
Thanks for the comment, Melanie! You know, cult really is the perfect word for these extreme fitness displays. It’s definitely something that can’t be understood from the outside…where I’m happy to say.
Freshly pressed is really churning out some humorous posts lately, good thing as it seems to be needed lately. I like to walk after just a bit of running (1 block maybe) just to get the heart rate up slightly higher. At my age I’ve got to live as healthy as I can – never thought about that chemical release thing that you mention – I probably do not need to worry about “dropping dead” though so no reason to get alarmed about me! Thanks for sharing your blog, some of the comments here are pretty humorous too. At least our beloved runners can be martyrs for a good causes though – God bless ‘em everyone!
Thanks for the comment, Janae, and the sense of humor. I fully believe in living a healthy life…it’s the talking about it all the time that gets me.
Thanks again for reading!
How about…I run marathons, and…I don’t own a TV. This person could be the most annoying person in the world.
Yes , or im too busy to watch TV that gets me too.
Oh, geez. The Anti-TV people! I think I’d have to just unfriend that person. I don’t know what I’d do without my required weekly viewing of Psych and Bones. Thanks for the comments, y’all!
I believe that anyone who loudly proclaims that they don’t have a tv (especially those that do so repeatedly) secretly not only have a television, but a huge, surround-sound system where they watch hours of the Kardashians and Jersey Shore.
Brilliant post. I have never had any desire to find out whether I can run 26 miles – and now I know that was all down to self-preservation! x
Don’t you love when the universe aligns like that? We can just call it intuition and happily not run all that way. Thanks for the comment, zskdorset!
Congrats on being freshly pressed! As a (very slow) marathon runner (ok, shuffler) (ok, I also walk a lot through the water stations) (ok not just through the water stations – also throughout the course) I enjoyed reading your article. My goals are for “me” (but not for me to be “epic” or anything) and I have seen some of the country’s greatest cities and met some of the most wonderful people on my marathoning journey – no matter what distance they run
Thanks so much for the comment, Nixie, and for taking the post with a grain of salt. I’m a big fan of the “Follow your bliss” line of thinking – marathons are definitely it for some people and it’s nice to hear about the positive side of them that isn’t talked about so much. Anything that involves travel does look better in my eyes.
I actually am doing them for two reasons. But….my secret is…I HATE RUNNING. Until I don’t.
1st reason: I Used to smoke. Asthmatic. Overweight. The list goes on. When I complete them, I figure it’s an accomplishment, plus it keeps me from smoking, keeps my asthma in check, and weight down. If i didn’t have the goal, I wouldn’t care as much to keep those things in check (though I should care, I know).
2nd reason: I love to travel! So, my goal is to do one in each and every state. I just recently went to both Indianapolis, IN and Salt Lake City, UT – both locations I would have never taken a long weekend trip to, if not for my goal.
But yes, I did still like your post – you wrote your honest thoughts. If you aren’t pissing off someone, you aren’t pushing the envelope enough
I am now following your blog, btw.
http://www.nixietale.com
“I know it’s hard to believe, but running dozens of miles does not erase your fondness for drop-kicking puppies or that time you slept with my boyfriend.”
Hilarious. ;D Kudos to all you runners who see the humor in this blog. (As for those who don’t – it’s a blog, not a dissertation. Lighten up.)
Thanks for the comment, liking the blog, and especially the defense. You rock.
I loved the fun tone of this article, but some people, like me, tell people not to brag, but for accountability. If its a private goal, will some people finish?
The accountability side of things is a really excellent point. I think that’s why so many of my runner friends join running groups – in any major goal, it’s nice to have both the support and the accountability from like-minded folks. Thanks for commenting and taking it in the fun way it was intended.
Ive been a runner all my life, ran in HS, and College. I still run for fun. Its so annoying when people ask if I do marathons. NO! damit.
Next time Im just going to say I dont like to Shart myself at mile 24,just doesnt appeal to me.
Ill stick to 10Ks.
Ha! Thanks for the comment and the runner’s perspective, medicalathome! That’s got to be the number one complaint I hear from my friends who are runners – people always think marathons are the end of the running rainbow and everyone wants to do one. Running and marathoning are two rather different things…especially because of those less-than-great experiences marathoners have to endure. Yikes.
Cannot. Stop. Laughing! I spewed water all over the table as I was reading this.
That just cracked me up! I needed that laugh. Not a runner myself but I do enjoy working out at home. Thanks for the hilarious truths you have written girl!
Thanks, Chelsi! I’m so happy to give you a laugh!
I AM a runner (not yet a marathoner), but I have a theory that a lot of runners wouldn’t be doing it if they didn’t have social media outlets (blogs, facebook, twitter, etc) for bragging, and thus receiving compliments and praise. I blame social media for the root of all of today’s evils in my generation. And I apologize for them.
Thanks for the comment, Lauren! Also…I’m so with you. If I started a rant about the evils of Facebook, it could go on for hours. Being in touch at every minute of the day is not always a good thing.
I feel no sympathy for those who complain about the “13th mile cramp”. You signed up for it, so don’t complain to me. Sure its a great accomplishment, but there are plenty of activities worthy of much higher praise.
Thanks for the great comment! I feel like shouting Amen! to everything you just wrote.
This is hilarious and awesome. I love running and people always ask me when I’m going to do a marathon. Um… never? That just sounds boring. And frankly, quite painful for no good reason. I don’t need bloody feet or – more awesomely – to defecate on myself all for the ultimate goal of completing a marathon. It’s too much on the body – unless of course you’re Dean Karnazes and your body plows through lactic acid like it breathes. In which case, marathon on friend, marathon on.
Right? Running is one thing, marathoning is totally different. The whole world of marathon “side effects” is bloody terrifying. The chafing is only the beginning…the horrid, horrid beginning.
Thanks for the awesome/terrifying comment!
LOVE THIS. I run, because I like to run… and I can’t stand when people that never exercise suddenly decide “I’m going to run a marathon!” That’s cool, go pick out the most fashionable-unsupportive shoes from Dick’s, whine about your leg pain on Facebook, oh… and enjoy when your toenails fall off. I run because I love to run, not because I’m trying to prove something. Sometimes I wish I had the discipline to train for a marathon, but honestly, running for 4 hours just does not sound appealing to me! I And really, since marathons are so “trendy” now, it’s not so impressive. Have fun parking your car with your 26.2 sticker next to four other cars that have the same sticker and all have the very “impressive” time of a 4+ hour finish. At least do it to raise money for charity or SOMETHING.
Thank you so much for both your great comment and for having a sense of humor about it, from a runner’s perspective! Marathons really lost me at the falling off toenails…and the chafing…and all the other awful side effects. It all just sounds so unappealing!
I only started “running” a few years ago and let’s face it, it’s still mostly jiggling and sweating. But the only reason I even attempt it is so that I can EAT TASTY FOODS and DRINK TASTY DRINKS and I have no desire to run one foot further than it takes to accomplish those goals and not look like Jabba the Hutt. Bless you for your honesty. And congratulations on being Freshly Pressed!
Thanks so much, Windy! And you and I have the exact same exercise mindset. I will do whatever it takes, so I can eat that Kit-Kat bar guilt free.
awesome post!! Thank you, thank you!
Thanks for the comment! Glad you liked it!
Awesome post. i’m stil going to do the crazy and run the Chicago marathon. Just Once. Then off my bucket list.
Thanks, Pinchy! And, as much as it pains me to say it…good luck with the marathon! I may hate running long distances, but I do love a good bucket list. Good luck with the rest of your items on it, for that matter!
1. What’s to keep someone from running marathons AND volunteering? Or would that just be way too much ass-hattery?
2. “But, to date, science has been hard pressed to establish a clear cause-and-effect link between strenuous exercise and heart damage.” From a NYT article about a study on extreme endurance (male) athletes. http://well.blogs.nytimes.com/2011/03/09/when-exercise-is-too-much-of-a-good-thing/
3. There are way better things in this world to be offended by. Marathons are approximately #516,982 on my list.
Thanks for the comment, not-a-marathoner! I actually saw that same NYT article, when checking sources for this blog post and found it pretty interesting. My take on it all is that we just haven’t done enough research, however. We don’t know if it’s causing damage in these small populations we’re studying or endurance runners at large. Just another medical mystery we’re unraveling. That it happens in some people is enough for me, however. And – no worries! – I’m probably offended by those other 516,981 things too.
Oh my, today I singed up to run the Berlin marathon in Sept 2012. A couple of years back I cycled from London to Paris (450 miles) just enough time has passed for the whole ordeal to slip into the realms of a kind of warm feeling nostalgic achievement…..so, thought it might be time to don my sweat pants, grab my deep heat rub, vaseline and grease up and run through Berlin like some sort of fembot machine lady.
The great thing about participating in such hardcore acts of endurance is you can train like a mad man for a few months, do the deed then sit back for a few years and feel like you’ve deserved it, Oh and to raise money for a great cause along the way. Your post pretty much summarized my sisters sentiments when I told her what I’m planning on doing.
Nervous.
The Big Mac
x
p.s love the blog- we have this huge poster in our flat, you might like it:
http://www.zazzle.com/romantic_adventures_spinster_poster-228214399100600091
Thanks so much for the wonderful comment, Mac! Even if I’m not a fan of them myself, I have to admit – they are pretty awesome feats marathoners and other endurance athletes are accomplishing. Incidentally, that cycling ride from London to Paris sounds amazing. With that kind of scenery, even I might sign up for such a thing.
Also, that poster is the best thing I’ve ever seen. Thank you so much for the
link! Hopefully it’s not too late to add things to my Xmas list.
Thanks for giving the ‘asshats’ of the world a reality check. I like your style.
Thanks, Dena!
as a lifelong runner and an aspiring (expiring?) triathlete who recently started a blog about his mis-adventures as a newbie triathlete (aka. “just another mid-life crisis”) let me just say that i was completely offended…..that it took this long for your blog to get FP’d!
and let me assure you that the quest to recapture the “golden aura of goodness” does not end when you hit your 30th birthday. And for fortheloveofgod, how can anyone take you seriously when your chosen sport involves something called a “fartlek”?! Thank you for using a very sharp and well aimed instrument to poke fun at those of us (present company included) who tend to take themselves a wee bit too seriously when they announce to the world that, yes, they have embarked upon/are presently enduring/have completed and will never ever do again, a marathon/triathlon/ironman/hotdog eating contest.
brilliant stuff. keep tipping over the sacred cows!
Thanks so much for the great comment, Todd! Even more thanks for having such a sense of humor about your sport. You are my favorite kind of athlete – witty!
My God – just the blog I needed to read! Right now I started a new job working side by side with a f%*$king Waspy narcissistic goober who doesn’t shut the f%*$k up about the number of miles he ran this morning or that. THE most boring person ever to walk (or I should say run) on this planet…
Thank you so much for the comment! That is exactly my point – running a marathon does not negate your bad personality traits. Good people run, but so do annoying ones. My sympathies over your new office mate. Earplugs should be on your Xmas list.
I am literally training for a full marathon right now as I’ve only ever run halfs, and I still love this post. It is literally speaking directly to me.
Thanks so much for the comment and your sense of humor, Katie! Simply because you seem like an awesome person, let me honestly say…Good luck on your marathon!
I once ran from a bee. I’ve also run to my car in the pouring rain. Considering my sloth-like temperament and agility–a shrine is in order. –yo jones
Ha! That’s my kind of running, Yo. Thanks for the comment!
We agree with you. Marathons are damaging to all of us …
http://guysandgoodhealth.wordpress.com/2011/11/10/why-you-shouldnt-run-a-marathon/
Tony
Hey, I’m up to half a mile a day. Thanks for the encouragement.
Ha! Good luck, Sue! Thanks for commenting!
amen sister!!! i have better shit to do than spend hours running and thinking about all the other things i should be doing. spare me, marathon runners. while you’re out in the cold with sore knees and blisters on your feet praying that you’re almost half way done, i’ll be inside by a fire with my slippers on sipping a hot chocolate and baileys. have fun.
http://www.icouldntmakethisshitup.wordpress.com
Truer words…
Thanks for the great comment, Eva!
So funny! So true!
Wow! Some of the comments!
Perhaps a content warning at the top…
WARNING! This is a humorous essay based on truth and personal opinion and is not intended to inspire offense or solicit input regarding preferred exercise routines. Smile!
btw-have any Brits complained about mocking their spelling techniques?
Thanks for the laugh and congrats!
Thank you SO much for this comment, Societyred! I’m glad to know most readers got the humor I was trying to get across. And, oh heck, I didn’t even think about offending the British! They’re all waking up now…maybe that’s the next comment wave to come?
Ahaaa brilliant
Pure bloody brilliance 
Glad you liked it.
Thanks for commenting!
This might just be the best damn blog post I’ve ever read.
Ha! Thanks, K2! Glad you liked it!
Last time I did any serious running was when very large mean looking dog was chasing me….3 front yards and a 7-11 store later I suppose I won…..just saying
Raven
Now that is a running win I can congratulate! Well done on the canine-avoidance race, Raven!
phew thank goodness i just read this. i was debating between getting up and going on a run, and staying in bed to watch old xfiles dvds. I feel like this was a sign from God.
Happy to be of help, Rachel! Xfiles is always the correct decision.
Great post and congratulations on being freshly pressed!
I just wanted to bring up the story about the man who suffered a heart attack while he was running a marathon but because his heart was so strong from all the running he did, the heart attack wasn’t fatal and I think it was discovered that one of his arteries was 95% clogged and if not for his good physical condition, he would’ve died 15 years before the heart attack.
The actual story is super sweet. http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=dDnrLv6z-mM
But anyways, I completely understand! It’s the same thing as going vegetarian or becoming environmentally aware because people just ‘care’ so darn much. Going Green has become a huge fad. Drives me nuts.
Thank you so much for your comment and sharing that story, Mauria! What a sweet tale! You know, it’s really the fad part of all this that gets me, you’re exactly right. Excellent insight.
Thanks for writing, I work at a gym, I secretly thing marathon runners are some kind of cult. Along with the running clubs. I run for fun and do not whatsoever attempt a distance over 5 miles.
-New subscriber
Thanks for commenting and subscribing! You hit my exercise theory right on the head…it should be fun! Why do it, if it’s not?
If I have to read one more post in my Facebook feed about someone’s run, I am going to puke. Thank you so much for this blog post — every time I work out I don’t feel the need to get people to validate it for me, and I also don’t do it for a “good cause” — I do because I want to, dammit, and that is enough.
I am so happy this resonated with you, Rheabette. I’m glad not to be the only one rolling my eyes at every Facebook marathon post. They’re killing me! Working out should be personal, not a public thing you shout from the mountaintops. Thanks for the great comment!
I got up to 13 miles after slowly training and increasing miles every week but then my heart started to hurt during the night time so I thought maybe this isn’t so good for me after all. Now 40 minutes a day I think is better, not such a strain on the heart, knees, shins and so on. Great post, thanks for the information about heart scarring, never heard that before anywhere.
Thanks for commenting, Hamid! The heart research is relatively new – within the last 5 years or so, it’s really become a studied area. Things are still a bit inconclusive, because of the small study sizes so far, but we’re seeing some damaging trends among endurance athletes. I fully believe that the body tells you when you’re doing too much or not enough, for that matter. I’m glad you listened to yours!
My knees have always said to me: Don’t run, swim. Alas, there is no fame in swimming, unless you actually do something stupid and cross the English Channel. But then there are no bumper stickers for that one, so I guess I just do my occasional trip to the local pool and leave it at that. Thanks for the great laugh and congrats on being freshly pressed.
If you decided to swim the English Channel, Sandra, let me know. I think that would definitely deserve a bumper sticker! I’d be happy to make it myself.
Thanks so much for commenting!
Nah, I’d say should I ever get that itch, please check me in with the nearest shrink. And get me a nice warm, preferably electric blanket, the Channel is, even at the height of summer, far from what I’d call swimmable.
Very funny post! Congrats on being Freshly Pressed.
I used to run 5ks regularly, then my friends decided to up the ante and train for a half-marathon. I destroyed a knee and a foot trying to keep up – not in speed, just in distance. And yes, I was working up to it slowly using a training regimen that apparently worked for many, many, many (many many) other people. My body just wasn’t made for it. I am now *less* fit from trying to live up to the modern definitions of “accomplishment”.
As for the distant runner thing – I *used* to be friends with 2 people who became hard-core distance runners. After awhile, it seemed that all they did was run and talk about running. Power to them, and all but….zzzzzzzzzz
Thanks so much for commenting! Stories like yours are exactly why it’s so hard for me to be blindly supportive to friends who decide to marathon. Our bodies can be surprisingly fragile and endurance events push them…many times too far. I hate to hear of injuries coming from people sincere intentions regarding their health. It’s part of what infuriates me about the endless marathon rah rah bombardment.
As a runner and someone who has run everything from 5ks to marathons this made me laugh. Yes we runners are crazy, but you have to be to do all of the training required for a marathon and then actually complete it. Your mention about runners who put the 26.2 or 13.1 on their cars made me crack up! It’s so true!! I have them on my car too and whenever I’m going to a race and get lost, I look for those bumper stickers and just follow them. I think one of the great things about races these days is that some runners are now raising money for charity, which at least takes some of the narcissism out of the sport. But I still love myself a race tee and a medal.
Thanks so much for the great comment and having a sense of humor about it, Tavalava! I feel a bit better about the stickers, now that I know there’s a navigational strategy that comes fwith them. When I go to the big writer’s conference every year, I love following the people with the black publishing totes, so I know exactly where I’m supposed to be. I may have to be easier on the stickers now.
Awesome!
Thanks!
I just posted this on Twitter. I’m sure I’ll get bitched out by runner friends, but too bad. This was funny. I already blogged about all the damn pressure for runners to run races and how I’m not drinking the Kool-Aid. I’m a runner because I run. I DON’T have to run a marathon to prove it. So again, right on!!!
Thanks so much for the great comment and the posting, Cherie! You have such a good point – being a runner doesn’t mean you should have to do a marathon! I dance, but I’m never pressured to dance a full length ballet. You shouldn’t be either!
1) I have run a marathon and several half-marathons
2) I love me some Zumba (i just wrote a provocative post about how skinny girls have no business doing Zumba. No, I’m not skinny.)
3) Your post made me snork coffee out of my nose.
I enjoy road races of all distances, but I’m not gonna lie: I kinda like to see the “oooooh!” “aaaaah!” look on people’s faces when I tell them about the 26.2 or 13.1…I’m vain. I accept that about myself. I probably have undiagnosed self-hate issues, too (blisters and blood and speed-pooping), but I’ll just stick to my story of “I like the t-shirts.”
I find myself rolling my eyes at Yoga-Lovers. (Yogi’s?…Yogurts?) Many act as if a Sun Salutation gives them the right to lecture me about the joys of soy sausage or rectal douching. Fine: you can touch your (tiny) boobies to your knees while showing off every.single.underarm hair. Glory be! You’re flexible! …also, you have ugly feet and fart every time you Downward Dog, so THERE.
…see? we can all rant a little bit about the Holier Than Thou’s in every sport.
Shall we dish about those volleyball bitches now?
Love your blog. I’m totally subscribing now. Cheers!
Yerttle, you had me a “rectal douching.” Awesome, awesome comment. You’re giving marathoners an excellent name.
And, oh, those volleyball bitches….don’t even get me started.
This post made me laugh. I admit, it’s not good for me to run. I have asthma. I swim instead. It’s better for my joints, anyway.
Thanks for the comment, Eileen! Also, I’m such a swimming zealot. It’s so good for you, but still low impact. Swimmers FTW.
If you gotta run a marathon, there are basic rules.
1. Don’t drive to the site with someone in an old car with an exhaust leak. You’ll be huffing before the starting gun.
2. Don’t run with someone who eats three times the normal breakfast as a carbo-load. You’ll be alone at five miles while they’re blowing chunks in the blackberries.
3. Don’t get on the ground and stretch at mile twenty because someone else does it. They’ve collapsed and you’ll have trouble getting back up.
4. If you follow two people talking, let them run off. They’re in better shape.
5. If you don’t get a massage and a survival aluminum foil looking blanket at the end, just be glad it’s over. You’re tired and you still have to get in the fume car for the ride home.
6. Walking up stairs backward is normal after a marathon. Be happy you can walk at all.
I love these rules, deegeesbb! If ever I were going to try my hand at endurance running, I think you’d be my guru. Thanks for the great comment!
I know you’re almost a doctor and all, but you’re wrong about the health effects of marathoning. Good luck in med school though.
Bwahahahaha!!! I just came in from a run and figured I’d relax for a minute and catch up on the Freshly Pressed only to find this and laugh my ass off! This is hilarious,wonderfully snarky, and honest. I’m going to go share this with my running friends. Thank you and congrats on getting freshly pressed.
Thanks so much, renowriter – both for the comment and having a great sense of humor about your sport. You rock.
This made me laugh… you make some good points. Congrats on being freshly pressed!
Thanks, LadyT! Glad you enjoyed.
Great post! Congrats on your run
Thanks, L-Jay!
I loved the hell out of this blog post. I saw one of those damned 26.2 bumper stickers today, and it filled me with rage. This hilarious and spot-on post is exactly what I needed, and I’m going to show it to my long-distance running husband. I predict he’ll love it.
Ha! Thanks, Erica! I’m so happy to know that those bumper stickers enrage others. If I didn’t love my Volvo so much, I probably would have bumped someone by now….you know…accidentally.